It is indeed possible to be successful in the intercultural field.
It is possible to be successful and humble in life.
It is possible to be successful, humble and still very curious even after an entire lifetime dedicated to the same cause.
Janet is an icon of my field. This area that very few people have heard about, and even less people know what it really is, including my parents.
One of the hardest parts working as an interculturalist is the so-called “impostor syndrome”: you never really feel like you deserve what you want since there are no authorities telling you what you do actually exists and receives recognition. Janet, a woman, was able to overcome all that, and founded the most important institute for those who want formal education in the area, the Intercultural Communication Institute, in Portland, Oregon in the USA.
Snakes, cultural identity and communication
Janet’s first interest in Brazil was snakes. I found that curious and a bit stereotyped.
And then I caught myself telling her personal stories about how my father would actually have a box in his car so he could catch the snakes he would find on the way from farm to city, to take them to the research center in our very small town so that they could produce an antidote.
I suddenly realized how snake stories were a very important part of my identity. It might not say much about Brazilians in general (although I think it actually does), but it definitely built a bridge between our cultural identities. A punch of self-awareness!
Dealing with cultural differences – from the golden rule to mothers
In Janet’s opinion, curiosity remains the most important characteristic to be developed in those who want to deal with cultural differences. Cognitive complexity follows as a need for and a consequence of the experience of facing the unknown.
Empathy, not the golden rule, completes the triad of the core developments you need and get from embracing otherness. It’s important to explain: the golden rule means doing unto others what you would like them to do to you. Empathy means doing unto others what they would like you to do to them!
But the most important tip to me was to understand the role of mothers. If you really want to understand someone that is different from you, try to understand the mind and heart of this person’s mother.
From the mothers of suicide bombers, to the mothers of the Americans who are sent to war, to the mothers whose children are now fighting for Lulas or Bolsonaros. There’s always wisdom in a mother’s heart, and it’s always a good way to start empathizing with mindsets that are not like yours.
It doesn’t mean you have to like it. Just be able to ethically respect that the other is and will always be an infinite other (Levinas). Intuitively, I have been using this very same metaphor in my workshops for years, but hearing it from the mouth of Bennett is something else.
As a ‘young’, contemporary, want-to-be relevant as an intercultural professional, I took the opportunity to be close to an idol and asked Janet if I was going on a good path. She said yes 😉 What an honor to have lived those few moments with you and learning so much from your willingness to share and your patience to teach, you brave woman, mother of the field, and extraordinary diva.